Honestly
by buttermeuplikeabreadroll
Summary: Cole has no idea what his sexuality is. All he knows is that he's in love with Jay. Written for evelinaonline's Ninjago Pride Week 2019 on Tumblr. I combined the first two prompts because I was already behind, haha. Day One: Questioning Day Two: Date


**Hey guys, back at it again with some Bruise! This is for evelinaonline's Ninjago Pride Week 2019 on Tumblr. I was already behind so I combined _Day One: Questioning_ and _Day Two: Date_ to bring y'all this.**

**Co-Posted on Ao3**

* * *

Honestly, Cole had no idea what he was. Was he gay? Was he straight? Was he bisexual? Who knew, really.

In the past he's had a girlfriend _and_ a boyfriend. He's never really thought too much on what that meant before. All he knew was he loved both of them when they dated. He could really care less if they were boy, girl, or something else.

That made him wonder before if perhaps he was pansexual, like Kai. He wasn't so sure if he could call himself exclusively pansexual, though. And unlike Kai, he didn't really catch feels for people so fast.

And that made him think maybe there were similarities to both of his romances that drew him to them. But honestly... The only thing Seliel and Daniel had in common was that they both had darker hair and their names both ended with "-iel". Beyond that, they couldn't be any more different.

She was bold and energetic. He was shy and cautious. Go figure.

The point was he closed the discussion on his sexuality quite a while ago. He didn't really find something he could connect with so that was that.

Until now. Until for the past few years he's wondered why he found himself so attached to Jay. He wrote it off as simply enjoying their friendship. When Sensei Wu recruited their team, Cole was alone and then one day he brought home this annoying kid named Jay.

He wasn't going to like this guy, he thought back then as Jay would follow him around everywhere like a lost puppy when Sensei left to get their third member.

But turns out he was dead wrong. Over the next coming months, he somehow developed a friendship with Jay, no matter how chatty or clingy he was. Suddenly Jay became his favorite person to talk to. Turns out he ended up keeping that lost puppy.

And after all these years, he's still the happiest when he gets to spend time with Jay.

But he knew it was probably something else that made his heart beat faster when Jay excitedly grabbed his hand to show him a new video game for sale. Or sent shivers down his spine when Jay would fall asleep on his shoulder at breakfast after a particularly brutal session of early morning exercises.

Or, heck, why was he so overjoyed when Jay asked Cole to accompany him on their year-long solo missions looking for Wu?

It was when they had to share a bed in a hotel room during that search did Cole realize it.

Jay had jokingly told Cole, "Goodnight, Honey," before he turned off the light.

That's all it was: A joke. Except it only made Cole recognize how much he'd really like for it to be for real.

And oh my God, he was in love with Jay.

So back to his current conundrum: what even was his sexuality? Now comparing Seliel, Daniel, and Jay, the only thing the three had in common was that they were all someone Cole could call his closest friends. While he had drifted from Seliel and Daniel over the years, he could still remember their strong bond back when.

So he was attracted to people he could first consider his best friend. Great way to make him understand his sexuality for sure, thanks.

Except for when he stumbled across the asexual spectrum online. And suddenly he had a word to describe himself.

Demisexual. Ah. That sounded about right.

For someone who put his sexuality on the back burner for so long, not really caring about what exactly he was, it felt... Nice to finally realize just what he could identify with.

But that was only the first obstacle he had to face. This next one would be way scarier, way more nerve wracking.

He had to know if Jay felt the same way about him too.

...

Finding a time to bring it up was easier said than done. If they weren't busy with training or doing other ninja duties, Cole would get too nervous to actually spit the words out.

And he regretted to say it, but he ended up avoiding Jay to try to figure out the best way to casually ask him.

So he should've seen it coming when Jay knocks on his bedroom door one late afternoon.

"I have to go pick up some, um, parchment paper for Sensei. Did you wanna come with, maybe?" Jay asks, sapphires never settling on one thing, darting between Cole, the floor, and the wall.

"Sure," Cole agrees. Shit, why'd he do that?! He's not prepared for this just yet. "I'll bring my umbrella, the forecast says it might rain in the next hour."

Jay beams with his thousand-watt smile and Cole instantly remembers why he said yes. "Great! I'll get my boots on."

...

It's only a light drizzle when Cole and Jay head to the calligraphy store. They keep the conversation casual, something actually not that typical of them. It never took long for them to start going on tangents of various topics, so this felt just a little weird.

Cole blamed himself for that. He's keeping distance while his thoughts mull over the best course of action.

They get the big rolls of paper and tuck them into the bag before the head back out the door. And standing there under the awning, they find the once misty drizzle now a straight up downpour.

Jay huffs a laugh. "Geez, where's Nya when you need her?"

Cole opens the umbrella, making sure the paper doesn't get damaged the second they head out there. "Guess we'll just have to make do."

Jay huddles closer to Cole to get coverage from the umbrella and they head down the street together.

Now they're just silent and that is 100 percent _not_ normal for them.

It's when they reach the crosswalk and are waiting for the red hand to disappear does Cole realize something.

Didn't Kai and Lloyd buy parchment paper for Sensei last week? He remembered them coming home and Kai complaining about how nearly every crosswalk was red for them and how cold he was.

If Sensei already had his paper, then why...

The crosswalk beeped for them to go and as they crossed the street, Cole glanced down to Jay to see his cheeks a rosy pink.

_'It's probably the cold weather,'_ is Cole's instinctive guess, but the other side of him wants it to mean something else.

He also realizes Kai was right. While they got two lights in a row, the third had them stopped again for what felt like forever.

And all Cole wanted was answers. So what the hell, he was going to say something.

"Jay, did Sensei really ask you to get extra paper for him?" He turns just in time to see Jay flinch at the question.

Jay probably only now realized the error in his rationale. He grins at Cole. "He could always do with more, right?"

"Sure he could, but I also know you like to procrastinate. And if he didn't ask directly for you to get some, I doubt you'd do it," Cole counters and Jay visibly gives up.

Jay shrugs. "Maybe I just wanted an excuse to spend some time with my distant best friend for a change."

"Oh," is all Cole can say to that.

Jay chuckles softly. "Yeah, you think I didn't notice? What's on your mind? Spill."

Cole shakes his head, but he can't stop himself from smiling. "Ever so perceptive of you."

They cross the street again and Jay looks over to Cole. "Does it have to do with why I'm completely dry and yet you're letting your shoulder get soaked?"

"You're the one holding the paper," Cole weakly defends.

Jay snorts, "Yeah, in this hand." He raises his right hand, the one completely under the umbrella. He reaches out with his other hand to tug on Cole's sleeve to get him to stop once they make it across the street. "Come on, give me something better than that."

Jay is determined, Cole would give him that much. He turns his head to look off to the side, sucking in a sharp breath. "I don't know, I didn't want to get you wet."

In response he hears Jay huff a dry laugh. "Hah, like you haven't already."

Cole whips his head to focus back onto Jay. "What?"

"What?" Jay blinks, his face turning several shades of red.

There's a pause between them that only manifests more tension the longer they lock eyes. So Cole furrows his brow and swallows his anxieties. "Jay... Do, do you like me? Like... _Like _me, like me?"

"No!" Jay says rather too quickly before he gives in. "Yes... Maybe, I don't know!" He sighs, shoulders dropping. "Yeah, it's okay. I know you're not into me the same way I'm into you."

Cole starts at that. "Jay, are you kidding me? Of course I'm into you! It's almost worrying how much I love spending time with you. You're my best friend, but I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about us as something more than that. Honestly, it's embarrassing how much I think about it." He reaches out his free hand to gently grip Jay's upper arm. "If anything, Jay, I'm _solely_ into you."

Oh shit, he seriously just did that. So much for bringing it up casually.

Jay opens his mouth in an attempt to respond to that declaration. When he can't find his words, Cole tries for him.

"Jay...?"

Jay fists his hand in the collar of Cole's hoodie and pulls him down, his hot breath against Cole's lips. "Shut up, Dirt Clod."

It's certainly not the most elegant of kisses, but for them it was honestly perfect.

...

By the time they get home, hand in hand, Kai is the first to greet them.

Amber eyes dropping to their hands, he snickers. "Enjoy your date?"

But Jay doesn't deny it. He doesn't let go of Cole's hand either. He simply smiles at Kai, holding up their hands. "Yep," he replies, popping the 'p'.

They walk past him and Kai whips around, jaw dropped. "Waaaaaiiit a minute... You two are finally a thing?! Lloyd so owes me 20 bucks."

* * *

**Does that even count as a date? I don't know, for some reason I see Bruise "dates" as like "hey wanna go to the store with me?" "sure" or "let's take a nap together" "okay". Go figure. Also sorry for the total cop-op on the kiss, HOW DO YOU WRITE A GOOD KISS SCENE AAAAAAH-**

**PS, you know everyone was just waiting till Cole and Jay got together. You can't tell me otherwise.**


End file.
